Let’s face it: priorities are hard to handle.
Whether or not you enjoy writing essays, you have most likely left those papers unwritten until the night before it’s due. If you frequently do this, then you truly encompass the word “Procrastinator.” Essays are different from tests for obvious reasons. You can’t just study what’s already given; everything comes from your head. Essays are lengthier, and the amount of effort you put in greatly shows from the grade you receive from the teacher/professor. However, most of us have probably b.s.’d our papers and managed to get good grades — well done, lucky ones. But, the process of writing an essay under a strict time limit has affected us all. There are stages, and by the final stage, when you submit that paper online or in class, you will probably feel (and look) like you just survived an apocalypse.
Stage 1. Open up Word doc, check how many hours you have left, and then:
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Stage 2. Recover from sorrow by picking up your phone and indulging in the safe haven of social media like:
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Stage 3. See your friends sending you motivational Ryan Gosling memes when you tell them you really need to start writing your paper, and Gosling is like:
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And you go from this:
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To this:
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Stage 4. Somehow manage to write one sentence, but it’s a crappy sentence so you’re back to square one and you’re just:
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Stage 5. Reread the prompt 25893532 more times to get your thoughts together but to no avail so:
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Stage 6. Grab some snacks and hope that eating will help you write but you focus on how hungry you actually are:
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Stage 7. Fall into a food coma and wake up a couple hours later to find yourself in a distorted reality:
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Then see your blank Word doc on your laptop and:
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Stage 8. Go into lockdown mode so you shut everything off that’s distracting:
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Stage 9. Break down in tears of joy after writing one complete and coherent paragraph and pray that the paragraphs continue to come:
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Stage 10. But then you decide to celebrate so you watch an episode of your favorite TV show/anime/drama and it gets good so you have to watch another episode:
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By the time you remember you still have a paper to finish, you’re like:
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Stage 11. Return to lockdown mode but you start watching YouTube videos:
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About puppies and cats:
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And then you get to the weird part of YouTube:
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Stage 12. Suddenly a friend calls so you answer and s/he is ranting and you’re like:
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Stage 13. Feel the exhaustion and sleepiness kick in but you fight it:
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Stage 14: Stress-eat and simultaneously cry:
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Stage 15. Blast some classical music to help you focus but you end up jamming to Fetty Wap:
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Stage 16. Mind goes blank and you can’t form a proper English sentence:
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Stage 17. Hear birds chirping and peek out the window to see sunrise:
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Stage 18. Scream in agony as a stress-reliever:
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Stage 19. Start b.s.’ing because that’s what you’re good at:
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Stage 20. Have a moment of silence when you finish just minutes before the due date:
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Final result:
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This is soo hilarious!!
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